Saturday, May 18, 2013

A FEW THOUGHTS ON HAIR OR THE LACK THEREOF


Pick the one you like best (or add one of your own):

   1.   Too much fertilizer kills grass. Too much brain power kills head hair.

   2.   Hair loss is genetic. Don’t blame me for inheriting so much intelligence.

   3.   I have so little on top of my head because I have too much on my mind.

   4.   There’s so little hair on top of my head because there’s so much inside it.

   5.   You know what kills hair follicles on your head, don’t you? It's caused by too much brain confined in too small a space trying to escape through every little escape valve possible. I see you don’t have that problem!

   6.   Pattern baldness indicates overworked parts of the underlying brain. I see you think a lot about sex!

   7.   Scientists have discovered that bald men think about sex more often than men with lots of hair. Guess what that says about women?

   8.   If Samson’s strength was in his hair, why do you think they shave the heads of military recruits?

   9.   You are aware of the impact that long-term gravity has on you, aren’t you? As you age, gravity pulls the hair from your head down into your nose and ears.

10.   Most people come into this world with little hair. I’m planning to leave this world in the same way.

[Originally posted on Facebook on December 14, 2010.]

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